


Empty as a Bird's Wing

by Ange_de_la_Mort



Category: Kingdom Hearts
Genre: Agrabah (Disney), Fluff, Innuendo, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-09
Updated: 2019-10-09
Packaged: 2020-11-28 13:29:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,933
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20967326
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ange_de_la_Mort/pseuds/Ange_de_la_Mort
Summary: What was supposed to be a lazy day off work turns into a brief, but nevertheless annoying mission. It's all Demyx's fault, really, and one day, Xigbar will definitely learn to say "no" when Demyx asks him for help. One day. But not today.





	Empty as a Bird's Wing

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the Kingdom Hearts Rarepairs Zine "Missed Connections".

With heavy, sluggish steps, Xigbar slowly drags himself through the corridors of the castle and towards the direction his room. Of course it would be faster if he just opened a portal and walked through the dark corridors, but it's been a very, very long week and his social and mental batteries have been so worn down that he wouldn't be surprised if he opened the wrong corridor and ended up in a different bed than his own.

And wouldn't _that_ be embarrassing?

So he just has to make his way around some more corners like an old-fashioned pedestrian and almost consider himself lucky that he's not _that_ tired to get confused in the complex and ugly layout of the eternally similar-looking corridors in these hallways. When he finally arrives at his door and pushes down the door handle to take the last few paces that separate him from his bed, he almost wants to laugh, because suddenly, along with all the fatigue, all the normal physical signs of exhaustion, comes the indescribable memory of _joy_, of pure and utter _anticipation_ of a night full of calm and peace.

Heh. They've been running after their hearts for years now, so that they wouldn't just feel weak, fake decals of emotions - and then just the prospect of collapsing in his own bed after a long week of work and not moving for the next few days is enough to spark some actual happiness.

Surely if he reveals this to one of the others, they will think he's fucking with them.

With a jerky gesture, he pulls down the zipper of his coat just enough for him to slip it off his shoulders. The heavy fabric lands on the floor with a muffled sound, pooling around his ankles, and Xigbar carelessly steps over it, not even bothering to slip his boots off his feet, but rather sinking face first onto his bed.

Home Sweet Home ...

The mattress is too hard to be really comfortable, the sheet too thin, and because he hasn't been here for so long, a weak layer of dust has formed on his pillow and now tickles his nose. He sneezes and quietly turns his head to the other side.

Shouldn't the Dusks keep the castle clean when the members of the Organisation are away on missions? He probably should have a serious word with someone, most likely with Saïx, because Saïx thinks he is responsible for everything that has to do with the castle and their assignments.

But not now.

Now it doesn't matter.

Now there is only him, his uncomfortable, stale bed, and a few days of continuous sleep in which he doesn't want to see any of them. Not the superior, not Saïx, not even-

"I fucked up!"

-Demyx. ... so much for piece and quiet.

"Didn't you hear me? Xiggy? I fucked up!"

His voice nearly tumbles in hysteria, and Xigbar quietly wonders how tired he must have been if he hasn't even heard the door open. Or one of the portals. Maybe Demyx has been in his room the whole time, just waiting for Xigbar to come back to spoil the day with his whining.

Okay, maybe not, maybe Demyx really just wanted to surprise him originally, and then something happened that seems absolutely terrible according to his tone and vocal pitch, and usually Xigbar has nothing against his presence and helps him wherever he can, but right now he has to fight against the need to not just strangle Demyx so that he keeps his mouth shut for five minutes.

"Xiggy? Are you- you're not dead, are you?"

"As if," he mumbles and rolls sluggishly to his side, gazing at Demyx out of his remaining eye. "I wish I was that lucky."

Demyx blinks with irritation and then puts on a pout. "What? Why are you so mean?"

Take a deep breath. Very good. And now do it again. Don't start yelling. Be nice.

"Because," he begins slowly without moving another muscle, his face still pressed halfway into the pillow, but Demyx already shrugs his shoulders and waves it off in disinterest.

"Oh, whatever, you can tell me later. You gotta help me first, Xiggy, I've been having the _worst_ day of my life!"

Oh, really.

It' s not obvious to see, and sometimes Xigbar forgets it himself, but Demyx is no less selfish than the rest of their small gang. Actually, when he thinks about it more carefully, Demyx is the most selfish of them; the one who pretends to be dumber than he actually is and always tries to shift his own work and tasks onto the rest.

Maybe that's why they fit together so well.

For a moment he massages the bridge of his nose between his thumb and index finger and sighs deeply. Then he taps onto the space next to him, beckoning Demyx to sit down. "Fine.  _ Fine _ . I'll bite."

If he still had a heart, it would be full of warm and fuzzy feelings at the sight of Demyx's facial features clearing up like the sun after a violent hurricane and his eyes glowing with affection. However, without a heart and with a healthy dose of cynicism that he has acquired over the years, he knows that this will only be the beginning of a huge disaster.

Anyway, Demyx now sits on the edge of his bed and nudges Xigbar carefully until he lays his head in Demyx's lap with a quiet sigh, and although Xigbar knows better, should know better, although he can be sure that Demyx has screwed up big time and now just wants to please him in advance and the faint hopes that Xigbar won't get too upset, it still feels ... nice. The familiar warmth and smell of leather and Demyx's shower gel make him close the remaining eye and listen to Demyx's melodramatic story of suffering, cruelty and him as the only hero in a castle full of monsters:

"You know that Saïx is awfully mean these days?"

"You mean there are days when he isn't?" mumbles Xigbar, barely suppressing a yawn.

"No, I mean, yes, I mean ... anyway." Demyx puts one hand on Xigbar's shoulder and draws slow circles on it with his fingertips. "He gets really angry when you try to talk to him, and reason with him, and ... "

"The point, kid. Get to it."

But instead of finally talking about all the urgent things that are on his mind, Demyx prefers to beat around the bush some more, continues to touch Xigbar, carefully stroking his hair or pressing his thumb against the tension in his back until Xigbar sighs contentedly and drifts slowly into the dozy stage shortly before approaching semi-sleep.

"So I actually didn't really listen to what he said because hey, it's Saïx, and who in their right mind listens to Saïx when he's rambling, right?"

"Mhh."

"And so I might have signed up for a mission that doesn't really suit me. You know what I mean? You know I'm bad with some stuff."

"Mhh-hmm."

"Glad you agree, Xiggy! So, anyway, that's why I told him you'll do my mission for me."

Ah. There it is. The feeling of someone emptying a bucket of ice cold water over him. With one jerk Xigbar is wide awake and sits up so hastily that Demyx almost falls from the edge of the bed. "You did  _ what _ ?!"

"Hey! Hey, no need to get all shouty at me!" blurts Demyx hastily and raises his hands defensively, quickly bringing a little distance between the two of them. "I just mean ... this would kill me? And I don't think you'd want me dead?"

"I'll break your neck with my own bare hands if you don't tell me _exactly_ what you've done _now_, and I swear-"

"Okay! Okay, fine. Look, I'm sorry. I freaked out. Okay? I freaked out and tried to save my own ass." Demyx gets up and lifts his arms, gesturing excessively towards himself. "You've always helped me out, so I just thought ... " He sags his shoulders. "I'm sorry."

Xigbar brushes a stray streak of hair from his forehead and sighs, swinging his legs over the edge of the bed. "You really are a manipulative little shit, but you've been hanging out with me for years, so what am I even expecting?"

"Yeah," says Demyx cheerfully. "It's all your fault."

"Now you're pushing it."

"Sorry." Just as cheerful. With a giant grin on his face. Because they both know that Demyx gets off scot-free once again, that Xigbar doesn't just let him lie on the bed he made himself. Even if he'd damn well deserve it.

"Why am I hanging out with you again," he asks and wearily rubs his face.

"I'm cute and a good lay."

"Only in your wildest dreams." He looks up at Demyx and raises his eyebrows because there's something they haven't cleared up yet. "Where are we going anyway?"

"Wait, what, we?"

"Duh! You really thought you're off the hook _that_ easily? As if!" Xigbar scoffs quietly and points an accusing finger at Demyx. "Now spill it."

A melodramatic sound crosses Demyx's lips and he lets his shoulders hang so low that he can almost touch his toes with his fingertips. "But I don't wanna go to Agrabah," is the tearful response.

_Yeah, who does?_ He lifts his index finger again. "One more question: Why the fuck did you sign up for it then, anyway?"

"Didn't you  _ listen _ ?" Now Demyx taps his forehead with his own index finger. "It was a mistake. I stopped paying attention to Saïx's rambling and thought he was offering missions to Atlantica!"

_ Not that Atlantica is much better ... _

"Okay then, off we go," he says with a sigh and slowly gets up - his body protests and wishes to return to bed -, snapping his fingers to change the gravity around his coat so that it slides into his hand. As he slips his coat back on, he grabs Demyx by the wrist with his free hand and pulls him along.

_

Of course Saïx is standing around in the common room and looks at Xigbar with the faintest hint of a grin on his lips. "So you really are here ... And here I thought he was trying to weasel his way out of work again."

"Yeah, sure, whatever." Xigbar shrugs his shoulders and puts a hand to his hip. "Sometimes you just gotta help your friends out, Saïx. I'm sure you'll understand that if you ever find some friends." The smile freezes on Saïx's lips - everything that has to do with friends is a sore spot for him, one in which Xigbar likes to dig - and he opens his mouth for a reply, but Xigbar is faster: "Now, what's the details for this little field trip? You want us to find a new member, or build some sand castles for the Heartless?"

Saïx rolls his eyes and takes a look at his clipboard, obviously skimming over the details himself once more. "In Agrabah," he finally says, "there is a man called Jafar. He is the Grand Vizier of the current ruler, and apparently not too happy about only being the right-hand-man."

"And that's for sure? I don't really care about hopping over and saying hi to that guy just to find out he's living the best life."

"His heart is full of darkness and has been for years," Saïx adds and slowly lowers the clipboard. "I think you can guess what that means."

"Maybe his goldfish drowned and now he's salty," mumbles Xigbar so quietly that only Demyx can hear it, and then nods curtly. "Well. We won't find out more by standing around."

_

"I _hate_ this place."

"Yes, Demyx, I know."

"It's hot and sandy, and I  _ hate it so much _ ."

"Yes, Demyx, thank you for your input. I'd never have guessed."

"And I-"

Xigbar stops abruptly and turns to him on his heel, poking his index finger against Demyx's chest, "If you say one more time how terrible this place is, and how much you hate it here, I will personally kick your ass. Do you think I want to be here? As fucking if!

Demyx squints up at him and then crosses his arms in front of his chest, looking aside. "That's not what I wanted to say at all."

"Oh, really." Xigbar sighs tired and with effort suppresses a yawn. "Then what _did_ you want to say?"

"Boy, am I glad you're asking." Now Demyx lets his arms drop and rolls his eyes. "I actually wanted to say that I couldn't believe how _eager_ you were to get here."

"What?"

"Yeah, you were all 'We won't find out more by standing around'," he imitates Xigbar changing the voice to a miserable impersonation. "Like, what was that about? This is Agrabah, man, not some happy fun place. If you wanted to be here so badly, why did you even take me with you?"

What? Really? Is Demyx really gonna play this game with him? A quiet growl crosses his lips, and without warning he grabs Demyx by the wrist and then drags him along. Demyx protests. He ignores it. "I want this to get over with so I can crash in my bed and sleep for a year," he grumbles to him. "If it took me sounding oh-so-happy about having to carry my ass to this place for Saïx to shut up and stop trying to vomit too much useless intel at me, then so be it."

"Huh. So you've just been pretending."

"I'm so glad you're catching up."

Demyx remains silent for a moment before trotting after him. "Hey," he says quietly. "Hey, are you really mad at me?"

Yes. Of course. Technically yes. Not too much. Damn it. "Maybe," he just says.

"Oh. Maybe means not really, right?"

He sighs and takes a look over his shoulder, glances at Demyx briefly. There's an apologetic expression in his eyes, an insecure twitch at the corner of his mouth. Probably both as fake as everything about them. And yet ... If Xigbar had a heart, this look might even soften him.

Sometimes it's quite good not to have one ...

"I've been having a shitty week, and now I gotta do your work instead of relaxing. That's not exactly earning you any favours with me."

He hears Demyx quietly chuckle. "And how would I earn favour with you, old man? Want me to put you into a retirement home?"

"Only if you the play the cute nurse giving me a sponge bath."

"I bet I'd look hot in a skirt."

The image makes Xigbar smile, and when he looks over his shoulder again, he can also see a smile on Demyx's lips. For a moment they hold each other's gaze, then they both burst out laughing and it feels as if the tension that was between them is vanishing into thin air. Slowly he lets go of Demyx's wrist and brushes a bit of sand off his coat. "We'll keep that one in mind for later. Now let's get going."

He turns around and pushes ahead without looking back again.

And when Demyx hurries after him and interlocks his fingers with Xigbar's, the cold, empty place where his heart once sat fills with warmth.

_

"Hey, Xiggy," Demyx begins sometime after they've been walking for a while. "Why are we still so far away from Agrabah?"

Xigbar shrugs his shoulders without releasing Demyx's hand. "Maybe your portal game sucks. Or maybe when you thought of this world, your mind thought of the desert instead of the city and that's why the portal led here."

"Mhh", says Demyx quietly and out of the corner of his eye Xigbar can see him scratching his neck. "Or maybe it was fate and we're supposed to find something here."

"Sure." Xigbar chuckles. "Maybe your heart was your guiding key to this place. Whatever floats your boat, kid."

"You're always so mean!"

"And you're a manipulative little piece of shit," he says with fondness in his voice. "I think we're quite a match."

Demyx sticks out his tongue and sighs. "Whatever. I just hope we're there soon. It's way too hot here. Especially with our coats."

"Oh, are you starting to whine again?"

"I'm not starting", Demyx corrects him gently. "I never stopped."

"Of course. Sorry. My mistake." Slowly he starts to climb the next dune and sighs. "Why aren't you just using your powers to create a cold shower for the both of us?"

Demyx raises his eyebrows and looks at him for a long time. "Don't be stupid, Xig," he says then. "I thought you were a scientist."

"Look, the heat is frying my brain, and also, Braig was a _part-time scientist_ and might have slept through that lesson, so please enlighten me."

For a moment it's quiet between them, and he can feel Demyx's gaze resting on him. He's probably just thinking about whether Xigbar is kidding him or not. Then he probably decides that he doesn't care which way it is and begins his small lesson about water magic: "You know, I mostly just shuffle existing water supplies around. That's why I'm strong when I'm in a world with a lot of rivers and oceans and not so strong in this one."

"Yeah, but that doesn't make any sense. I've seen you make water clones out of thin air before."

"I know."

"So you can do that?"

Demyx falls quiet and looks aside. The grip of his hand briefly tightens, as if he has to hold on to him to keep his composure. "I don't ... " he finally starts saying with a soft voice. "I don't like doing that." At Xigbar's questioning glance, he bites his lower lip briefly, worrying it between his teeth. "When I do that, it takes a lot of my strength away. I don't know why, but I think ... I'm using part of myself to make them then."

Xigbar thinks about it for a moment. "So basically ... you think you're draining the water from your own cells if nothing else is around."

"Kinda, yeah."

"Interesting. Did you ever talk to Vexen about that? I bet he'd have a field day with it."

Hastily, Demyx shakes his head. "Are you crazy? He scares me! If I told him that, he'd strap me to a lab table and cut me open!"

"Come on, he isn't that bad ... most of the time." At Demyx's frightened glance, Xigbar smiles. "Then maybe I'll just bring it up with him. He wouldn't dare cutting _me_ open."

Demyx mumbles something incomprehensible that Xigbar doesn't even want to hear at all. Then he stops suddenly and stares to the ground.

"Hey. You okay?"

"Wait. I think ... is that ... ?" Now Demyx lets go of Xigbar's hand and kneels down, scraping his hands in the sand like a dog looking for a place to do business, somehow funny to watch and cute at the same time. Finally he emits a surprised sound and extends his hand to Xigbar. There's something small lying on his palm. Something golden. "Look! That was half buried by the sand."

Xigbar looks at it for a long time and frowns. "Half a bug? Is that real gold?"

"I have no idea", exclaims Demyx as he stands up and brushes the sand off his pants, then pockets the bug figurine. "But I'm gonna keep it. Maybe it's worth a lot. Or maybe it's just a souvenir."

"Sure. Finder's keepers." Xigbar shrugs his shoulders and makes his way up the last steps to look over the edge of the dune. There is sand. More sand. A far too blue sky. And in the distance there is the silhouette of a big city. "Well, finally," he says to no one in particular. Then he turns to Demyx and points his index finger in the direction they have to go. "We're on the right track."

Demyx hurries to him and looks in the same direction Xigbar is pointing. Then he lets his shoulders sag and grumbles. "Why is it still so far away?"

For a few seconds, Xigbar looks at him and considers whether he should help him or not. Then he sighs quietly, remembering that he himself has no desire to march through the desert for the rest of the day and raises his hand to open a portal. "Come on, we'll take a shortcut."

"Oh. Cool! I mean ... hey! Why couldn't we do that before?"

"Because I needed to rub in your face that you suck at creating portals," Xigbar simply says and reaches out to him. "Also, now you got your little souvenir, so stop whining and let's go."

_

"Finally," says Demyx as they step out of the portal and stretches. "About time we're here."

"We would have been here earlier if you opened the portal correctly."

"Stop being a spoilsport and be happy we're here at all."

Xigbar rolls his remaining eye and crosses his arms in front of his chest. "Fine. Let's just remember that we're here to get some intel on this Jafar dude, and then we're gone again. I seriously need a shower."

Demyx grins at him and already opens his mouth to - as Xigbar suspects - make an insulting remark about his body odor, when suddenly a strange voice comes up beside them:

"Good evening, sirs! You are travellers, I assume? Came here from very far away to look at our beautiful city?" The little man with the beard and the turban, to which the voice belongs, roams around them like a predator on a prowl. He looks at them both extensively and briefly tugs at Demyx's coat, feeling the leather. Then he pulls Demyx with him and continues: "If you have come to this place for magic and mystery, and the beauty of the desert rose, you will need to see my wares."

"We don't care about your-" Demyx stops in the middle of the word and stares at the dealer, then looks at the small booth he chased him to. "I mean ... what is ... that?" he asks, pointing to a small golden figure of one half of a beetle with its wings spread out.

Huh, Xigbar merely thinks and eyes the merchant critically. What a  _ coincidence _ .

"I see you have an eye for the valuable things," says the merchant and disappears behind his booth, looking at Demyx from over the counter. "This is one part of what is believed to be the secret key to the Cave of Wonders."

"Cave of What?" asks Demyx and tilts his head.

"A cave of innumerable riches and values. Some say it might even be home to a magical being that fulfills all your wishes." He hesitates for a moment. "Sadly, the second half got lost."

Xigbar looks at Demyx. Demyx looks back at him. "We'll take it," says Xigbar and reaches out. "How much?"

The price is of course outrageous, but since it's not their cash, but the munny of the organization, Xigbar tosses a leather bag full of coins and notes to the merchant before he closes his hand around the beetle.

"A warning, good sirs," says the merchant after counting the money. "Only those with a pure heart are said to be able to enter the Cave."

"Oh, don't worry." Demyx laughs and points his thumb at himself. "A heart that doesn't exist is the purest of them all."

_

"Change of plans?"

"You got it, kid."

_

There are things Jafar expects whenever he enters his secret lair at night: Iago complaining about how the Sultan treated him. Iago complaining about Jafar not yet being Sultan himself. Jafar complaining about not being Sultan yet.

Just the usual.

What he doesn't count on is that the secret wall behind him closes and on the other side there are two men in black robes waiting for him, one of whom looks as if he's never avoided a fight in his life, and the other one, as if he's doing nothing but avoiding fighting. But Jafar himself knows that appearances can always be deceptive and he should not underestimate the second man either.

"Who are you?" Jafar asks and already raises his snake staff to attack before he can be attacked in return. The snake's eyes glow threateningly red.

But the one with the eye patch only laughs: "Don't worry. We're friends."

"Not mine."

"Oh, but maybe we will be", says the blond one and runs his gloved fingers through his hair. "We've kinda started to like this city. If only it were in more capable hands."

Jafar squints at him. "Do go on."

"Ever heard of the Cave of Wonders?" the blond man asks, and Jafar scoffs quietly.

Of course he has. Who hasn't? "Do you think telling me about the myths of my own country will make me feel sympathetic to you? I have searched for this cave for years. It doesn't exist."

"Maybe it does. If you have the right key."

As if they had coordinated, each of them extends a hand to him. On each of their palms lies one half of the Golden Scarab, the legendary key to power.

Jafar looks at them both for a long time before he asks: "What's the catch? I'm sure you don't offer me power out of the goodness of your hearts."

The one with the eyepatch laughs.

The other one shrugs his shoulders. "No catch. No favours. No nothing."

"We just wanna see you turn this city into something truly magnificent."

... well. how is one supposed to say no to that?

_

They are not staying to see if Jafar succeeds with his ambition. After all, that was not the mission they agreed on. And they both have no desire to stay in this world even one minute longer than necessary.

So Xigbar sends Demyx to Saïx to give his report, while he himself sinks onto the bed in his room without ever wanting to move again. ... maybe he should take off his boots, there is sand in his shoes. ... later. Now lying down is more important.

Maybe he's even fallen asleep, because the next thing he remembers is Demyx's hand in his hair playing with his ponytail, lost in thought. "Oh, you're awake," says Demyx quietly as Xigbar moves a little.

"That's debatable," he mumbles into his pillow.

"Come on. You wanted to get clean." When Xigbar only hums in exhaustion, Demyx pulls his hair a little. "You'll have sand all over your bed if you don't undress at least."

"... you're not leaving me alone, are you?"

"Nope," is the much too cheerful answer. "Now get up, you old fart. The water's already running."

All right. The prospect of a warm bath and then a warm bed is too tempting to refuse. So he lets Demyx pull him out of the bed and into the bathroom, sighing and half asleep, where he gradually gets rid of his clothes and drops them carelessly to the ground before he gets into the tub.

And. Oh. Oh, that's good. He leans back against the edge of the tub and yawns quietly. He could get used to that ...

"Hey." Demyx quietly shakes his head. "Not good yet." He reaches out to loosen the strap around Xigbar's ponytail, smiles at him as Xigbar's hair falls freely over his shoulders. "Better. But not perfect." Again he reaches out his hand, puts his fingers carefully on the eye patch. "That one needs to go, too."

Xigbar laughs quietly. "You really wanna see even the ugly side of me, don't you?" he asks gently.

"Don't worry, Xig." Demyx smiles, his voice is just as gentle. "All sides of you are ugly."

That makes Xigbar laugh again, and he just lets him do it, even though he feels almost naked without an eye patch. Funny. Not wearing any clothes is okay, but that ... hmm.

He watches as Demyx carefully moves the eye patch and hairband to safety, and then undresses himself. In silence, he watches him squeeze into the tub, nestling against his back from behind, his legs bent to both sides of his hips. Demyx presses a cheek against his and sighs contentedly, and as the water level rises in the tub, yet nothing splashes over the edge, Xigbar is almost certain that this is Demyx's and his powers' doing.

A hand strokes over his shoulder and down his chest and Demyx breathes a kiss on his scarred cheek, then gently bites his neck.

"Nu-uh." Xigbar pushes him slightly off and smiles wearily. "Not doing that right now."

"Oh. Uhm. I thought ... "

"You don't need to fuck me to thank me for saving your lazy ass."

"Maybe I want to, though?"

"And maybe you can do that later when I won't fall asleep in the middle of it." Demyx remains silent and Xigbar turns his head to kiss the corner of his mouth. "Let's just stay like that for a bit. It's nice."

"... it is", says Demyx quietly and kisses his temple. " Still. I owe you."

"You could have done that on your own. We didn't need to fight and you're smart."

"And easily overwhelmed. And anxious. And scared."

"And an idiot, but a smart idiot."

Demyx embraces him and puts his chin on his shoulder, breathes calmly and deeply until the warmth and his intimacy and the tranquility make Xigbar drift gradually into semi-sleep. "Hey, Xiggy," Demyx softly says eventually. "Someday I'm gonna save your ass, too."

"Can't wait," mumbles Xigbar and finally sinks into a dreamless sleep.


End file.
